From The Way of Sufi Chivalry, we pull these wise counsels from the text regarding Futuwwah:
"A follower of Futuwwah may go to a close friend's house without invitation." (ch. 1:1)
If traveling, perfect hospitality should always be extended and food offered to the hungry. "Do not find fault with food offered to you." (1:3)
Maintain good conduct and behavior, the kind that reflects the perfect behavior of the people of Paradise. "Serve whatever we have to our brother, even if it is a piece of bread, because the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s.) said, 'Generosity is a characteristic of the people of Paradise.'" (1:4)
"To visit each other for Allah's sake is generous behavior." (1:5) The host should serve everything he has to his brother. Even if he only has one drop of water left, he should serve that. If he does not offer what is possible for him to offer, his day and night are under the curse of Allah. (1:5)
"Let there be familiarity and closeness among brethren." The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s.) said: "The believer is the one with whom one can be close. The one who is not close and the one to whom one cannot be close are of no use. The good among men are those from whom others profit." (1:6)
Above all, be generous. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s.) said, "Paradise is the home of the generous." (1:7) 'Maintain old relationships.' The Messenger of Allah said, "Allah approves the keeping of old friendships." (1:8)
Keep your friends' interests at heart and care for your neighbors. "Someone who eats while his next-door neighbor is hungry is not a believer." (1:9)
When you bring a gift of food that in turn is offered to you, you must be extremely careful of your manners. "Don't count your friend's mouthfuls." (1:10)
in affairs that are not clearly sinful, be lenient with your friends. "The first sign of intelligence is to believe in Allah. The next is to be lenient with people in affairs other than the abandoning of Truth." (1:11)
Get along with friends and help them. "A man prepared a feast for the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s.) and his companions. When the food was brought to them, one declined to eat, saying that he was fasting. The Messenger of Allah said, 'Your brother has invited you; he went to a lot of trouble for you. Eat now. You may make up your fast later.'" (1:12)
Care for your brethren more than you care for your own family. We hear that Fatima, daughter of the Messenger of Allah, asked her husband, 'Ali (r.a.a.), for a servant. 'Ali answered: "Do you wish me to abandon those who have given up everything for Allah so that their bellies contract from hunger while I get you a servant?" (1:13)
The Way of Sufi Chivalry Futuwwah, Part 1, 14-20
Permit your friends to claim your possessions as if they belonged to them. (1:14)
Invite guests, offer feasts, and be hospitable. "How awful is a society that does not accept guests." The Prophet (s.a.w.s.) said that there is no good in the one who does not welcome guests. (1:15)
Respect your friends and show your respect for them. We learn that a man entered the mosque when the Prophet (s.a.w.s.) was alone. The Prophet got up to show him respect. When the man protested , the Prophet responded that to be paid respect is the right of the believer. (1:16)
Be truthful. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s) said, "Say that you believe in Allah; then always be truthful." (1:17)
Be satisfied with little for yourself. "The best of my people will enter Paradise not because of their achievements, but because of the mercy of Allah and their quality of being satisfied with little for themselves and their extreme generosity toward others." (1:18)
Be kind and gentle to others. "In an expedition with the Messenger of Allah, we saw a man riding a camel. He was rushing about, hitting people right and left. The Prophet said so that the man could hear, ' Whoever has an extra riding animal should give it to someone who has none. Whoever has extra food should give it to those who do not have any.' Then he started counting people's luggage. We all felt that none of us had any right to extra property. (1:19)
Love each other and frequent each other for Allah's sake. We hear, "The ones who love each other for My sake deserve My love; the ones who give what comes to them in abundance deserve My love. The ones who frequent and visit each other for My sake deserve My love." (1:20)
The Way of Sufi Chivalry Futuwwah, Part 1, 21-40
From The Way of Sufi Chivalry, we pull these wise counsels from the text regarding Futuwwah:
It is most rewarding to love the lonely and poor ones and care for them. The Prophet was heard saying: The people whom Allah loves best are His poor and lonely servants." "They are the ones who have nobody and nothing but their religion. On the Day of Last Judgment they will be brought to Jesus, the son of Mary." (1:21)
Keep your word and what is entrusted to you. The Messenger said, "If you have these four things, it does not matter even if you lose everything else in this world: protect what is entrusted to you, tell the truth, have a noble character, and earn your income lawfully." (1:22)
Do not wear the garb of the Sufi before you have qualified for it by cleansing your heart. The Messenger said, "Do not wear the woolen mantle of total devotion until your heart is clean, because if you wear these clothes while your knowledge is deficient, [Allah in His Name] al-Jabbar, the Compeller of the Heavens, will tear them off your back." (1:23)
Give elaborate feasts, be gracious when entertaining, and be generous to your guests. The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s) said, "Whoever believes in Allah and the Day of Last Judgment, let him be gracious to his guests." (1:24)
During these gatherings, begin your own meal only after everyone else has started eating. It is said that whenever the Prophet ate with others, he was the last one to begin eating. (1:25)
Understand that what you really own is not what you keep of your property, but that which you spend for your brethren. (1:26)
Share the joy of your brethren to the extent that if you are keeping a nonobligatory fast, you will break it to join the feast and festivities. The Prophet said, "If a person who is fasting joins his brethren and they ask him to break his fast, he should break it." (1:27)
Know happiness and joy in your relationships with your brethren. Someone asked: 'Tell me, did the Prophet of God ever joke?' He answered, "Allah bestowed on him the best manner of joyfulness. Allah sent other prophets who had suffering and distress, but He sent Muhammad (s.a.w.s) for mercy and compassion. One of the signs of his kindness and love for his people was that he joked with them. He did this so that they would not stay away from him out of awe."
The Messenger would say, "Allah hates those who make disagreeable and sad faces at their friends."
Remember that you are a servant of Allah and should not regard yourself and your actions highly, nor should you expect a return for your actions. It was said that Allah's anger is greatest, "When one considers himself and his actions highly, and worse still, expects a return for his good deeds."
Repent ceaselessly, with the strongest will not to return to the thing of which you repent, for only then is repentance acceptable. "Three things make repentance real: regretting the past, deciding firmly not to return to the state of which one repents, and having fear in one's heart. One is afraid because one knows perfectly well when one sins, yet does not know if one's repentance is going to be accepted or refused."
By loving the ones whom Allah loves, you attract His love to yourself. Someone asked, "Show me the shortest way to reach Allah Most High." Abu Yazid said, "Love those beloved of Allah and make yourself lovable to them so that they love you, because Allah looks into the hearts of those whom He loves; the He will find your name in the heart of the one He loves; then He will love you, too, and He will forgive you your wrongdoings." (1:28)
